Turkeyvolume
iUniverse Publishing presents…
The Taming of the immobilized cuddle party, by Turkeyvolume
”My dear Turkeyvolume! You’ll never know how much I truly love you!” said the cuddle party
“As do I” Turkeyvolume replied quickly. “Alas, our love was not meant to be. After all, you are to be wed to the great duke furnace of Canterbury in the morning!”
“But he is not a world-renown podcast member like you are!” the cuddle party cried aloud. “Compared to you, furnace is like a painfully honest pair of hairy legs.” The cuddle party then spat upon the floor, as to prove her point.
“Oh, my dear immobilized cuddle party, I know all too well what you mean. But that is simply how the world turns. Unless…” T paused for a moment to think. “No, that would not be the proper Victorian thing to do...”
“What is it Turkeyvolume, my love?” the cuddle party inquired. Turkeyvolume stared back at her, then broke into a smile. “Unless we elope my love. Come with me, let us run into the night, and make barbed love under the moonlight! Maybe we can even do that thing again where you take that sweet tailpipe and shove it up-”
At that very moment, the bedroom door slammed open, shocking the two lovers. “I’m afraid that won’t be happening,” great duke furnace growled, leaning against the door frame. “For tomorrow, after the wedding, cuddle party will be immobilized no longer. As for you, Turkeyvolume, you will be hanged for your adulterous crimes!”
Purchase a copy of The Taming of the immobilized cuddle party to find out what happens next!
$15.99 Paperback
$13.99 Digital