Turkeyvolume's self-summary

Turkeyvolume is a gorgeous 6 foot 3 inch tall individual who could easily pass as a human being. They have long, mischievous hair the color of a background story, and vengeful eyes. They are currently on the prowl for a lucky partner to date, harass, and fuck (in that order).

What Turkeyvolume is doing with their life

Turkeyvolume runs a succesful mediation harvesting farm. The process is a trade secret, but the results clearly speak for themselves. Every day, Turkeyvolume selects the most self-absorbed mediation, and loads up the back seat of their car with the prized harvet. They then sell the mediation at a local market, which fetches a pretty penny.

Turkeyvolume also is part of a comedy podcast

Turkeyvolume is really good at

Having an orgasm face that looks boldly sexy.

Turkeyvolume spends a lot of time thinking about

The legality of their business, and what to do when a mediation turns out to be more haunting than self-absorbed.

You should message Turkeyvolume if

You'd like to give them a hand with their work, and perhaps a hand when the two of you are done working, if you know what I mean. Turkeyvolume would also like to hear from you if you've recently passed your bar exam, or if you're looking to make money without asking too many questions.