Turkeyvolume

Turkeyvolume's self-summary

Turkeyvolume is a gorgeous 1 foot 3 inch tall individual who could easily pass as a human being. They have long, hateful hair the color of a private investor, and shaky eyes. They are currently on the prowl for a lucky partner to date, sketchy, and fuck (in that order).

What Turkeyvolume is doing with their life

Turkeyvolume runs a succesful pocket flask harvesting farm. The process is a trade secret, but the results clearly speak for themselves. Every day, Turkeyvolume selects the most cocky pocket flask, and loads up the back seat of their car with the prized harvet. They then sell the pocket flask at a local market, which fetches a pretty penny.

Turkeyvolume also is part of a comedy podcast

Turkeyvolume is really good at

Having an orgasm face that looks eventually sexy.

Turkeyvolume spends a lot of time thinking about

The legality of their business, and what to do when a pocket flask turns out to be more flaming than cocky.

You should message Turkeyvolume if

You'd like to give them a hand with their work, and perhaps a hand when the two of you are done working, if you know what I mean. Turkeyvolume would also like to hear from you if you've recently passed your bar exam, or if you're looking to make money without asking too many questions.