The Heavenator

The Heavenator's self-summary

The Heavenator is a gorgeous 5 foot 11 inch tall individual who could easily pass as a human being. They have long, fighting hair the color of a volcanic crater, and rancid eyes. They are currently on the prowl for a lucky partner to date, surround, and fuck (in that order).

What The Heavenator is doing with their life

The Heavenator runs a succesful keepsake machete harvesting farm. The process is a trade secret, but the results clearly speak for themselves. Every day, The Heavenator selects the most maniacal keepsake machete, and loads up the back seat of their car with the prized harvet. They then sell the keepsake machete at a local market, which fetches a pretty penny.

The Heavenator also is part of a comedy podcast

The Heavenator is really good at

Having an orgasm face that looks gracefully sexy.

The Heavenator spends a lot of time thinking about

The legality of their business, and what to do when a keepsake machete turns out to be more emerging than maniacal.

You should message The Heavenator if

You'd like to give them a hand with their work, and perhaps a hand when the two of you are done working, if you know what I mean. The Heavenator would also like to hear from you if you've recently passed your bar exam, or if you're looking to make money without asking too many questions.