Spaced God

iUniverse Publishing presents…

The Taming of the emerging deer antler, by Spaced God

”My dear Spaced God! You’ll never know how much I truly love you!” said the deer antler

“As do I” Spaced God replied happily. “Alas, our love was not meant to be. After all, you are to be wed to the great duke tank of Canterbury in the morning!”

“But he is not a world-renown podcast member like you are!” the deer antler cried aloud. “Compared to you, tank is like a nighttime canister of liquid oxygen.” The deer antler then spat upon the floor, as to prove her point.

“Oh, my dear emerging deer antler, I know all too well what you mean. But that is simply how the world turns. Unless…” S paused for a moment to think. “No, that would not be the proper Victorian thing to do...”

“What is it Spaced God, my love?” the deer antler inquired. Spaced God stared back at her, then broke into a smile. “Unless we elope my love. Come with me, let us run into the night, and make demanding love under the moonlight! Maybe we can even do that thing again where you take that trust fund and shove it up-”

At that very moment, the bedroom door slammed open, shocking the two lovers. “I’m afraid that won’t be happening,” great duke tank growled, leaning against the door frame. “For tomorrow, after the wedding, deer antler will be emerging no longer. As for you, Spaced God, you will be hanged for your adulterous crimes!”


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