Portaxx
iUniverse Publishing presents…
The Taming of the barren corn cake, by Portaxx
”My dear Portaxx! You’ll never know how much I truly love you!” said the corn cake
“As do I” Portaxx replied inquisitively. “Alas, our love was not meant to be. After all, you are to be wed to the great duke cuddle party of Canterbury in the morning!”
“But he is not a world-renown podcast member like you are!” the corn cake cried aloud. “Compared to you, cuddle party is like a slap happy trust fund.” The corn cake then spat upon the floor, as to prove her point.
“Oh, my dear barren corn cake, I know all too well what you mean. But that is simply how the world turns. Unless…” P paused for a moment to think. “No, that would not be the proper Victorian thing to do...”
“What is it Portaxx, my love?” the corn cake inquired. Portaxx stared back at her, then broke into a smile. “Unless we elope my love. Come with me, let us run into the night, and make twisted love under the moonlight! Maybe we can even do that thing again where you take that pocket flask and shove it up-”
At that very moment, the bedroom door slammed open, shocking the two lovers. “I’m afraid that won’t be happening,” great duke cuddle party growled, leaning against the door frame. “For tomorrow, after the wedding, corn cake will be barren no longer. As for you, Portaxx, you will be hanged for your adulterous crimes!”
Purchase a copy of The Taming of the barren corn cake to find out what happens next!
$15.99 Paperback
$13.99 Digital