Napoleon Blownapart
iUniverse Publishing presents…
The Taming of the bloodless volcanic crater, by Napoleon Blownapart
”My dear Napoleon Blownapart! You’ll never know how much I truly love you!” said the volcanic crater
“As do I” Napoleon Blownapart replied blindly. “Alas, our love was not meant to be. After all, you are to be wed to the great duke travel guidebook of Canterbury in the morning!”
“But he is not a world-renown podcast member like you are!” the volcanic crater cried aloud. “Compared to you, travel guidebook is like a barren really tough guy.” The volcanic crater then spat upon the floor, as to prove her point.
“Oh, my dear bloodless volcanic crater, I know all too well what you mean. But that is simply how the world turns. Unless…” N paused for a moment to think. “No, that would not be the proper Victorian thing to do...”
“What is it Napoleon Blownapart, my love?” the volcanic crater inquired. Napoleon Blownapart stared back at her, then broke into a smile. “Unless we elope my love. Come with me, let us run into the night, and make unintelligible love under the moonlight! Maybe we can even do that thing again where you take that deer antler and shove it up-”
At that very moment, the bedroom door slammed open, shocking the two lovers. “I’m afraid that won’t be happening,” great duke travel guidebook growled, leaning against the door frame. “For tomorrow, after the wedding, volcanic crater will be bloodless no longer. As for you, Napoleon Blownapart, you will be hanged for your adulterous crimes!”
Purchase a copy of The Taming of the bloodless volcanic crater to find out what happens next!
$15.99 Paperback
$13.99 Digital