Vinny Possum
iUniverse Publishing presents…
The Taming of the embarrassed knife, by Vinny Possum
”My dear Vinny Possum! You’ll never know how much I truly love you!” said the knife
“As do I” Vinny Possum replied elegantly. “Alas, our love was not meant to be. After all, you are to be wed to the great duke canister of liquid oxygen of Canterbury in the morning!”
“But he is not a world-renown podcast member like you are!” the knife cried aloud. “Compared to you, canister of liquid oxygen is like a craggy furnace.” The knife then spat upon the floor, as to prove her point.
“Oh, my dear embarrassed knife, I know all too well what you mean. But that is simply how the world turns. Unless…” V paused for a moment to think. “No, that would not be the proper Victorian thing to do...”
“What is it Vinny Possum, my love?” the knife inquired. Vinny Possum stared back at her, then broke into a smile. “Unless we elope my love. Come with me, let us run into the night, and make screeching love under the moonlight! Maybe we can even do that thing again where you take that sneaky criminal and shove it up-”
At that very moment, the bedroom door slammed open, shocking the two lovers. “I’m afraid that won’t be happening,” great duke canister of liquid oxygen growled, leaning against the door frame. “For tomorrow, after the wedding, knife will be embarrassed no longer. As for you, Vinny Possum, you will be hanged for your adulterous crimes!”
Purchase a copy of The Taming of the embarrassed knife to find out what happens next!
$15.99 Paperback
$13.99 Digital