vampiresoftware
iUniverse Publishing presents…
The Taming of the vengeful keepsake machete, by vampiresoftware
”My dear vampiresoftware! You’ll never know how much I truly love you!” said the keepsake machete
“As do I” vampiresoftware replied joyously. “Alas, our love was not meant to be. After all, you are to be wed to the great duke twinkling diamond of Canterbury in the morning!”
“But he is not a world-renown podcast member like you are!” the keepsake machete cried aloud. “Compared to you, twinkling diamond is like a sketched famous landscape painting.” The keepsake machete then spat upon the floor, as to prove her point.
“Oh, my dear vengeful keepsake machete, I know all too well what you mean. But that is simply how the world turns. Unless…” v paused for a moment to think. “No, that would not be the proper Victorian thing to do...”
“What is it vampiresoftware, my love?” the keepsake machete inquired. vampiresoftware stared back at her, then broke into a smile. “Unless we elope my love. Come with me, let us run into the night, and make naked love under the moonlight! Maybe we can even do that thing again where you take that boy mayor of secondlife and shove it up-”
At that very moment, the bedroom door slammed open, shocking the two lovers. “I’m afraid that won’t be happening,” great duke twinkling diamond growled, leaning against the door frame. “For tomorrow, after the wedding, keepsake machete will be vengeful no longer. As for you, vampiresoftware, you will be hanged for your adulterous crimes!”
Purchase a copy of The Taming of the vengeful keepsake machete to find out what happens next!
$15.99 Paperback
$13.99 Digital